She’s a busy girl, that Caroline Smailes. Her novel, 99 Reasons Why, was released last month and now she’s got another book out – this time in collaboration with flash fiction author Nik Perring and illustrator Darren Craske.
Freaks! is a collection of over fifty short stories, where you’ll find freaks and misfits such as a woman who can reproduce herself at will and attempts to teach her daughter to do the same; the man who can break his way into his lovers dream; and the woman in My Little Pony Pants who likes to be ridden like a pony.
As a taster, here’s Invisible, one of the stories in the collection.
[Super Power: The ability to make oneself unseen to the naked eye]
If I stay totally still,
if I stand right tall,
with me back against the school wall,
close to the science room’s window,
with me feet together,
if I make me hands into tight fists,
make me arms dead straight,
if I push me arms into me sides,
if I squeeze me thighs,
stop me wee,
if me belly doesn’t shake,
if me boobs don’t wobble,
if I close me eyes tight,
so tight that it makes me whole face scrunch,
if I push me lips into me mouth,
if I make me teeth bite me lips together,
if I hardly breathe,
if I don’t say a word.
I’ll magic meself invisible,
and them lasses will leave me alone.