Poem: Inappropriate Behaviour
This poem was part of my portfolio for the poetry module at university. Getting a 1st for the poetry module was undoubtedly the biggest shock of the three years I was there. I celebrated by buying a bottle of absinthe, as poets drink absinthe, don’t they? This poem came aboutContinue Reading
Leave The House Friday – Costa Coffee
I’ve got to admit, I’m a bit of a hermit. When it comes to leaving the house, I don’t actually like doing it. I frequently cancel social engagements because I don’t want to leave the house, even though I know I’ll enjoy myself once I’m there. So, to force myselfContinue Reading
Guest Post: My Experience of Working With Illustrators, by Nik Perring
Collaborating with Kirsty for the cover of The Flash Mob was a nerve-wracking experience. Would we like it? We absolutely LOVED it, but what if we hadn’t? I’ve known Kirsty for twenty-five years and it would have been heart-breaking to say, ‘sorry mate, hating your work’. Obviously, I needn’t haveContinue Reading
Wreck This Journal – Day 23 – Figure Out How To Freeze This Page
Blimey, freeze a page? How am I going to do that? Take it to the North Pole? Pour liquid nitrogen on it? I pondered this and pondered this and pondered this and… oh, hang on. I didn’t ponder it at all, I just bunged it in the freezer on topContinue Reading
Wreck This Journal – Day 22 – This Page Is a Sign – What Do You Want It To Say?
There was only one possible thing for a sign to say today. If, however, you have been moved by all these attention-seeking selfiers (is that a word? Probably not. Ho hum) who probably got so lost in the ‘OMG, LOOK AT ME, I’M SO BRAVE FOR POSTING A PICContinue Reading
Wreck This Journal – Day 21 – Collect Dead Bugs Here
My friend Claire and I used to collect woodlice and take them to the pub. That was a couple (okay, about twenty-five) of years ago though and my bug collecting days are over. Plus it says dead bugs and although I think my house in London has approximately two-hundred-and-thirty-million deadContinue Reading
Wreck This Journal–Day 20 – sdrawkcaB etirW
I got very bored very quickly writing backwards, so I decided to just write words where the letters looked the same backwards as the right way up but I could only think of w, o, I and l (and ‘n’ if you cheat and leave off the spiky bit), andContinue Reading
Wreck This Journal – Day 19 – Take This Book In The Shower With You
You’ll have to excuse the splodge from the apple and chocolate parcel – I used the book as a saucer. I don’t usually put pastry based products on my books, honest. It doesn’t actually say the shower has to be on, plus it had a paddle in the sea aContinue Reading
Wreck This Journal – Day 18 – Pick Up The Journal Without Using Your Hands
I said to Shaun, ‘you’ll have to take a photo of me doing it’, but he said as I’m not using my hands, I can take my own photo. So, I picked up the journal with my feet and took a photo. Do you like my slippers? £4.99Continue Reading
Wreck This Journal – Day 17 – Glue In A Photo Of Yourself You Dislike And Deface
It didn’t take long to decide which photo to use. I didn’t even have to think about it. Although, I don’t actually dislike it, as it sums up perfectly how I felt during the London Duathlon last year. I was cold, wet, bored, fed up and thoroughly pissed off. ButContinue Reading